Freedom is Aiming For the Heart
by wheresthefuninit
Summary: One-shot. AU. Set if Katniss' first time in the Hunger Games was her last. It's the next Games and a career discovers a way out.


**Disclaimer: I don't own the Hunger Games. If I did Peeta would have fallen off a cliff or something (Team Gale!)**

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I stand on the rooftop of the last building I will ever set foot on. It is a grand, flashy sky scraper made it impress the one track minds of the Capitals population. Not my taster. I prefer buildings surrounded by mountains that give way to blue skies. That is home. This is not. This is a cell, a prison, meant to hold me until I am sent to execution. They call it the Hunger Games, but everyone knows it's not really a game. It's a slaughter house. Each one of us lined up perfectly so that they can swing their ax down on to our small necks. My whole life I have been taught about the Hunger Games, my mentors have tried to prep me on it, I have been trained to win, I have even watch it live. I know that despite this I am not prepared, I never was and I never will be. Nothing can prepare you for becoming a murderer. The other kids, I mean the Careers of course, think that they are more than prepared. They think that it will be simple, challenging, but still simple. All they have to do is eliminate all the others. Sure fellow Careers will be difficult, but they can handle it. At lunch they about killing as if they are talking about making breakfast. I can't contribute to their conversations. In fact if it weren't for appearances and my district partner I would be with them at all. I am glad that I will no longer have to uphold that pitiful façade. I am glad I won't have to pretend to be honored any longer. Of all their talk I am sure this is the idea that leaves me the most disgusted and confused. How could one be honored by ruthlessly massacring 23 children? Where is the logic in that?

But this is Panem, this is the Capital, here there is no logic, only greed. _Panem et Circenses_, I am sure that as long as the Capital stands their way of life will as well. Because of the Hunger Games. Because they keep us divided. Because united we stand, divided we fall. Because we will remain divided. Our whole government stands on a game created out of revenge and the need to stay in control, the greed. I used to think notions like that were silly. How could that even be possible? But its true, and its certainly not silly. It's as serious as life and death. As serious as plump innocuous berries that steal children's lives as their sweat, deadly blood slowly glides down their unsuspecting throats. As serious as watching 24 children turn into monsters and rip each other apart, loosing what ever sanity they once possessed.

I don't want to become that.

I will never become a monster.

I finger the dagger I stole from the Training room. It was easy, pocketing it. No one suspects a Career would ever do such a thing. Even if they did, everyone would turn a blind eye. Careers have lots of sponsors. I know I'll get caught though. No doubt they have camera's here, they will find out what I want to do. What I will do. Time is of the essence, I need to be quick. I take on last look at the bright city that has condemned us all. In seconds everything will be over. Sometimes second feel like a lifetime.

5

The rooftops' door burst open with a large _Boom!_ Peacemakers are running at me. I think my district partner is there, too.

4

I try to think of my family and friends, as these will be my last moments, but I am too disgusted with them. I know they want me here. They want me to kill. Instead I think of the victors from 11 and 12. The way the look at the Capitals food in awe, and eat it as if they've never seen anything like it before. They probably haven't. I think about the ugly scars on their faces and their hands. Most of all I think about their eyes, which show the predictable hatred and anger but something else too. I think in their eyes I see pain, and wisdom and desperation. They looked aged, like they know things we do not. The other Careers see it too, and it makes them angry. It makes me curious, and scared. I know these eyes scare the Capital as well.

3

I know I am not Katniss Everdeen or Peeta Mellark. I am not strong or heroic. I am not doing this to prove a point. I am doing this for myself, because I will not be controlled by the Capital. They have taken everything from me. My freedom, my spirit. They have broken me and I haven't even entered the Games. I know I cannot let them use me any longer. I am not theirs. I am not anyones. I am my own person. I know I am not a rebel, I know my acts will be hushed up. But I will do anyway.

Because it's not about the Capital, or the other districts, it's about me.

2

I plunge the dagger into my heart. It is a nice direct cut. The pain is instant, and my blood pours onto my chest like a waterfall. The pain is extreme, but it is worth it. Besides the warmth from my blood is almost comforting, against the cool of my body. I fall to the ground, and some how I end face up.

1

My last sight is of the Peacemakers and my partner. They have not stopped advancing me, but I know it is already too late. The Peacemakers wear identical faces; a mix of horror, disgusts, and anger. I'm glad they are not using their usual stoic mask. It proves to me that they are some what human. I take in my district partner next. His name is Alric, and before the Games I did not know him. We do not get along, he is just like the others. He looks at me with all of his built up hate and then some. This pleases me because it tells me I am right about the Capital. They do create selfish killers. I smile at all of them with self satisfaction. I know for certain I am right about my thoughts. And now I have escaped the fate of the Hunger Games.

0

I die with a smile not even the Capital, in all it's glory, cannot rip off. Even with their vengeful hands. I am finally free.

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**A/n: Yeah so this is a lot different than my other story (which by the way is going through revisions and will be updated soon). It's way darker, and I'm really curious to see if anyone thinks it's good or not. It's kind of bittersweet for because even though I wrote this before reading Mockingjay, which I read later and it kind of, maybe completely ruined the whole series for me. So I consider this to be a parting from the Hunger Games, I guess, which is ironic because this one-shots all about death and stuff…..Any who tell me whacha think.**


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